passenger seats

in about 72 hours, i will be leaving for the ocean.

i need this break. i need it badly.
in a way, i've been holing myself up a lot lately, mostly running on empty automatic and whenever i get a spare second to even think about anything, it has no outlet. it just sits and i don't have the words for any of you, if it even matters. i don't have the words to explain to myself or any of you any of the other things that are happening outside of you.
lately, i keep waking up with this sick feeling in my body, choking back this sick immense feeling of 'you ruined something', 'you wanted this', 'you did this', 'you should not have done that, you should have done this', 'its gone', '
'of course you fucked this up again.'

necessity is the only word i have. one day, i'll have more.
until then, sound does a decent job.



one day i'll have my own shop to print in, for other people to print in.
one day, i'll have a restaurant.
one day i'll talk and you'll listen.
one day you'll talk and i'll listen.
one day we'll speak.
one day i'll get in my car.
one day i'll go.
one day i'll step into the water and not want to take the deepest breath i can.
one day i won't feel the need to go.
one day these bones won't be so tired.
one day these bones won't matter.
one day my soul will feel young again.
one day all i will see will be land and sky.
one day we won't need to make excuses.
one day we won't need to feel guilty.
one day the funks will be a little easier.
one day life will be a little sweeter.
soon.



i'm awesome at post cards. message me your address if you want one.